Mingea


So you decided to get yo poke on 
who you gonna poke?
hmmmm
so many choices

Cowgirls? Yeehaw-yeah! 
If Stetsons, Justin boots, and Wrangler butts drive you nuts, then welcome to paradise amigo. It only gets better when you start a little county line dancing or two-stepping with all the fine ladies from neighboring states. It’s called Reverse Cowgirl for a reason since these chicks are gonna be looking for a real man and by real I mean drives a truck, wears boots, chews, has a belt buckle the size of your face. If you’re sporting Armani, you’ll be bustin your mutton before you hook up with one of these heifers. “Wanna come over later and see my horse?”

Gangsta girls? Por que no? 
I gots my Dickies, my Locs, rollin in my ’64 and there might even be a tattoo on my neck – orale! For sure the Latina Nation will be in tha 719 and you better be ready for fun homie cuz these ladies will be lookin for someone to dance with, walk the Midway, win her teddy bears and buy her Budlite Limes all night. My only caveat is the competition will be tough so things could get heated. Lucky for you, there’s about a million cops in case someone gets all up in your grill and you gotta break’em off some. “Wanna come over later and watch Blood in, Blood out?”

Rockers? We salute you! 
By far the easiest going, these girls are super fun and low maintenance. All you need is a crappy old Mustang, some Levi’s, a black t-shirt and Chuck Taylor’s and you’ll be nose deep in makeup, hairspray and leather. This is also a good selection if you wanna smoke a joint on the Ferris Wheel. I don’t know if you checked lately, but there are a lot of way hot rocker chicks – party on! “Wanna come over after and listen to Pantera?”

College Girls? Aww hells yeah!
 This is the pretty much the last shindig before hitting the books so you might was well look for some hotties in flip-flops, Abercrombie, and jean skirts. Although they are super hot and some aren’t even old enough to drink, these ladies will be looking for someone to make them laugh and maybe see some live music. If you think you got the game, better pop your collar, and hope all those sit-ups pay off because these pretty little ladies are looking for a sharp dressed man, not a broke, fat slob. These girls are your best shot at riding the rides and sharing funnel cakes and lemonades. “Wanna come over after and play beer pong?” 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Idiots

Image
Forgive me for inventing the "Blog." So many people (not me of course, or the bug, or some other people - but you know, most people ) have such shitty blogs that I now fear the wrath of a million sinning wannabe "writers" who think people give a fuck about what happened to them at the "Walmarts," or how their dog talks to flies, or overbearing spouses, or people who use too many commas. Now that my invention is completely out of control, I have to go around the world poking peoples' eyes out whilst simultaneously cutting off their fingers to prevent the further corruption of my invention . Please stand by for eye-poking-outing and finger-chopping-offing. If you don't see me in the next 48 hours, please cut your own fingers off, AFTER poking out your own eyes. Please people, this is important, if you cut your fingers off first, the poking of the eyes will be extremely difficult. Until then, there is a slight chance of redemption . If you must keep...
Read more

Summer is here

That means it's time for some serious medical information. Do you suffer from SBS ? Millions do, you could be one of them! SBS , or Sweaty Ball Syndrome , affects many unsuspecting men every summer . As the temperature rises, so do the chances that YOU could get SBS . "Last year, I got SBS so bad I couldn't even walk," claims Tad Fresher, a local man employed as the photo-finish operator at the turtle races. What can be done? you're wondering. Not much - as it is, even in the cooler months, men are afflicted with SBS . With the rise in temperature, it's inevitable that more will suffer. "My balls sweat - period, day or night, hot weather be dammed, they frikkin sweat year-round" exclaimed Feelmi SacDuWrink , an exchange student finishing his undergrad in Digital Environmental Bio-fusion.
Read more

Things I Might

Say to you if we lived together. I "accidentally" peed on your toothbrush What cake? I didn't think it was that dirty I'll do it later No, you're welcome Come on, just the tip What, oh - just kidding about the "tip" bit Let me check my schedule, um, NO I feel like some muthfukin Taco-Bell You didn't know I was a nudist?
Read more