stolen right off the Onion
forgot to add6. my jokes stay fresh forever
Haven't posted in a while
Not sure why it's not like I'm busy I guess just lazy. Overall not much to mention.
Popular posts from this blog
Dear Loser
To Anonymous, Grow some balls and revel yourself if you're going to post "consumer whore" on this here blog. Also, the irony is you have a computer if you're reading this shit and you have Internet access, so I guess you're also a consumer whore. Do you live in a hut that you built yourself? On Walden pond? In Concord? You fucking hypocrite. Do you eat only food you grow yourself? I thought not. Hop in your Land Cruiser and go buy a pound of used clothes at the Goodwill and shut the fuck up. Meanwhile, I'll go to Starbucks and have a Venti Mocha. ps Thanks for giving me something to rant about.
Insert title here (instead of your ass)
Now is where (or "when" you picky fuckers) I go on and on about how the summer flew by and I didn't do shit. Those of you who have to work all the time - otherwise known as chumps - will give me no quarter but who cares? I mean whom cares? Ok, so I did some writing, not just for this piece of shit blog, but for a legit paper that those cool kids know about and read and love and... But other than play in the city tourney, and teach a creative writing class, work a wine festival in Paonia , spank it, and invent the internet, I didn't do shit. Not that I didn't want to be more productive, but I feel that the Earth's gravitational pull is especially strong in my ass. In fact, right now I have a team of scientists studying the phenomena. They are calling it " Culo Magnetico " - (yes they're Mexican scientists, you fucking racists). Sure, I discussed the coming armageddon, but seriously, who didn't? So I know you're all on the edge of you ...
That's awesome. Now I want to be a teacher too.
ReplyDelete